Getting over a stroke

I am hoping people out there can help me I'm 43 and had my stroke 7 months ago. I have some left side paralysis and am learning to walk with a quad stick. How long does it take to get over a stroke. I'm so tired all the time I've lost all motivation in how I look and recently find myself wishing I had died. I wouldn't be a burden on my partner. I'm really struggling with my situation and what happened. I want to know when there is light at the end of the tunnel. When will it get easier and I will feel like a normal person. Anyone please help. I feel.so alone and angry

Hi sorry you're feeling as you do....I've no doubt we've all had those days of feeling will it ever get better than this and will I ever get back to normal. I know I have and it seemed dependent on how bad the fatigue was.

For some 7 months can still be quite earlier in terms of recovery. When I had my stroke 2 years ago I wondered if I'd ever make it out the front door again and was sleeping up to 18 hrs a day . Two years on whilst I still have some residual effects from the stroke, life is much better and I did make it out the door and back to work albeit part time.

For me the key to dealing with fatigue is lots of routine and repetition, trying to keep life as stress free as possible and not allowing myself or others to put undue pressure or expectations on me. There's only us who can do our recovery.

Hang in there I'm sure you will find as the fatigue improves so will your mood. Take each day at a time and count any improvement as a blessing. It will get better!

Sending you a big hug x

Thankyou so much. For takingvtge time to respond x

Dear Gizmo
The months tick by don't they. And you are early days.
Stroke aftermath does not cure itself. It is up to us to cure ourselves. The physical side is the easier bit. Recovery can go on for however long it takes. So please get determined to repair yourself physically. Quad sticks are good aren't they. But make it a temporary stick. Get those legs moving. The legs aren't damaged, "just" the messages from your brain.

I too wish I had not come back from the resus. But we did survive, so we are both special. Why were we given a life when most die ? There must be a purpose in life for you and me. And physical wellbeing will help us find it.

We need to concentrate on a little recovery each week. It is not like other illness.
We have to work at it, but also have to avoid overdoing things.

I worked away just to establish a sleep pattern. Going to bed at the same time helps. And daytime naps are sitting rather than lying. I record each days sleep. otherwise I forget what I am doing. Having a written record shows up any small progress.

Regarding normal. We aren't going back to the old normal. We are not the same person. Our brains do not work the same way as before. So we get a new Gizmo and a new normal. I think you are a long way from finding the new Gizmo. Early days methinks.

Don't let depression get to you. That slows down your recovery. Smile several times a day. Be positive. Walk a few yards (age showing) today then a tiny bit further tomorrow. rite down your progress and congratulate yourself.

Best wishes
Colin

I'm only two months in but knowing I've got a life sentence ahead of me is pretty tough especially because I'm only 34, I imagine you feel the same being young? I'm still grieving for the old me that died and trying to understand the new me. I've found this forum very helpful for good advice and reading that I'm not alone in my feelings

Joe, Please do not look on it as a life sentence. You are a young man and two months in is no time. I am an elderly man fifteen months in, so I do not have youth on my side. All any of us can do is 'our best'. You have a wife and children who love you and you are already overcoming some big challenges. If you can go camping and try plastering a wall after two months, think what you will be able to do in four months, six months or a year. Fight on and you will get there!

Everyone keeps telling me being young and having age on our side is a good thing but I'm not convinced. It just makes me miss the old me more. It makes relationships harder to and it does feel like a life sentence

I've made amazing progress and I'm proud of myself but I'm well aware the trauma and mental scars from it all are going to stay with me, but I'm optimistic that I've got a promising future ahead of me and I'll never give up because then the stroke wins. I was just summing up my thoughts when I was really depressed.

The reason it is good to be young is that you have more strength to fight your way back to recovery. Once sixty is reached (or 65 or 55, whatever) then the natural ageing process confuses things. Also, if it takes x years to recover then you will have many years after recovery. I was 68 when bitten, If it takes say 3 years to recover then I will be 71 and well in to old age. Not so many years after recovery,
Relationships are very hard. Hopeless fickle family and friends. But we do have the option to make new friends. I have some sympathy for others. We look well and its impossible to accept we are ill when we look so well.
I do not agree the idea of a life sentence at all. The sentence was stroking. Usually over in a few hours. Now we are on parole and then living a new life. Not a life sentence, that's a very poor analogy. You have been chosen to live your new life. That cant be without some reason. We are here for a purpose and you and me have been especially chosen to live. We are secial, so lets try our best to live up to that.
Smile
Be positive
You are not alone
New Colin

That's great news how is your walking and moving about now. I suffered left side paralysis so learning to walk again

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